Went to the paper shop - it had blown away. My mother would never let me hear the end of it. I've dedicated my life to linguini. I'm doing door-to-door collecting for static cling. I'm trying to be less popular. My pet snake is constipated again.
Upon receiving the picture, she tells her husband that she wishes she also had a picture of Ahmal. Funny Dating Jokes: First Date One hot summer night in 1960, Steve had his first date with Susie. A father and son are in a car together and get in an accident. It's that time of the month again. I have to go for my full body wax appointment 134. I'm going through cherry cheesecake withdrawal.
The Ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent. Went to the corner shop - bought 4 corners. I'm in great mood tonight because the other day I entered a competition and I won a years supply of Marmite. I have to study for a blood test. I just got back together with my ex 158.
Researchers scoured the web and examined more than 1,000 jokes before whittling them down to a final 50 on which 36,000 people voted. I backed a horse last week at ten to one. You see my next-door neighbour worships exhaust pipes, he's a catholic converter. Finally, one day over the summer, he sees her at home and musters up the courage to ask her out. Funny jokes about dating - He vs SheHe: Can I buy you a drink? I have to knit some dust bunnies for a charity bazaar. I would, but it would be a complete waste of make-up.
This is partially based on a true story. His eyes are on his date still on the other side of the store to make sure that she doesn't see him buying the pants. Contents is protected by international copyright laws. Bill looked up and said, To your house. Because nothing gets under their skin. The breeder asks Earl what the dog did.
The barman says, Is this some kind of joke? The monsters haven't turned blue yet, and I have to eat more dots. Why did God create man before woman? He held the record until May 2005 when Australian comedian, Anthony Lehmann squeezed in 549 gags The Top 50: 50. My crayons all melted together. They come Mary's doors and she says: - Would you like to come in for a cup of tea? You catch her giving her phone number to the guy cleaning your windshield. I can't believe this happened. I have to read the labels on all of my food. I'm planning to go downtown to try on gloves.
He was being burned and tortured by demons. I promised my mum I'd bathe the hamster. I left my body in my other clothes. A woman gets on a bus with her baby. Boy: This is a beautiful sunset, isn't it Anna? After all, you enormously helped society by putting a computer in almost every home in the world and yet you created that ghastly Windows 95. I've had a better offer, some bloke is coming round to set fire to my head 142.
Your dinner reservations are under Loser, party of 2 He's especially proud of how long he can sustain a burp. Hot 7 months ago Cross my heart this happened to someone. Because if they all went, it would be Hell. I said, I've been on telly but I'm no Dean Martin. Things were getting hot and heavy when the girl stopped the boy.
I just picked up a book called Glue in Many Lands and I can't put it down. I just found out we're related. A three-legged dog walks into a saloon in the Old West. I have plans to clean the cracks in my floor 117. I'm writing a love letter to Richard Simmons.
The stranger turned out to be Santa Claus, stranded with a bag of toys. He charged one and let the other one off. My chocolate-appreciation class meets that night. Chester says, Well, I got him from the breeder up the road. After a few minutes, the rumbling subsides, but he still has a bit of gas stored up.